Everyone knows about the challenges and discomforts that come with Having The Toughest Talks with someone.  Whether its about under-performance with a co-worker, the canceling of an agreement with a partner company or service provider and/or trying to resolve a conflict issue with a family member or friend…the discussion moments are tough!  In response some ignore or hide from the challenge(s) hoping that it might resolve itself.  Others might take a “my way or the highway” hardline approach just to move it forward (good or bad) in some way.

No one “enjoys” the Having The Toughest Talks moments.  I know that I have touched on this issue over the years in other TRIPLE III TIME messages, but today it is time to give it a special TOP 10 “helpful thoughts” blog segment.

1. Treat the person/persons how YOU would want to be treated during a Having The Toughest Talks situation.
2. Gather as many “facts” as you can regarding the challenge…but stay open to new/additional facts as the tough talks continue.
3. Do NOT enter Having The Toughest Talks discussions with your mind already made up on what will happen afterward.
4. Appropriately use each person’s age and experience as measuring tools in assessing the situation.
5. Leave other people’s opinions “at the door”.
6. Listen well and take notes.
7. Correctly compute the values related to action options (i.e. firing the person/canceling services/personnel reassignment, etc.)
8. Consider the precedent-setting issues that will result from your action or inaction.
9. Don’t ignore the option of postponing action on the issue. Sometimes delayed action is a solid positive step for all sides.
10. Finally understand the high-value of compromise while Having The Toughest Talks.

I am sure there are more than these TOP 10 “words-of-wisdom” that would be helpful when Having The Toughest Talks.  Please add them to this list and build your own set of resolution recommendations.  Responding to Having the Toughest Talks incidents will always be “a work in progress”!